Reality … my mom

The Chicken that Entered Politics

I got this in an email from a friend.. i thought it was funny

Why did the chicken cross the road?

SARAH PALIN: Before it got to the other side, I shot the chicken, cleaned and dressed it, and had chicken burgers for lunch.

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One! that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn’t about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where’s my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken’s intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won’t realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road. What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he’s acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I’m going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens.

ANDERSON COOPER, CNN: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other side of the road.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he’s guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN: To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer’s Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed I’ve not been told.

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn’t that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken 2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken 2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never crash or need to be rebooted.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one?

No Comments….Just a Warm Tear

Fiqh asSalah ~ Lesson Three

Tahaara (Cleanliness)

Tahara

What necessitates Ghusl?
1. Sexual Intercourse:

Prophet said: “If one part enters the other part (in another report: if one part touches the other part), then ghusl becomes obligatory” Reported by Muslim and Ahmad

2. Ejaculation:

Prophet said: “What requires water (ghusl) is if you see water (i.e.,semen) coming out of you.” Reported by Muslim

3. After menses and postnatal bleeding:

“…And when they have purified themselves, then go in unto them as Allaah has ordained for you]” al-Baqarah 2:222
Prophet said to Faatimah bint Hubaysh: “When your period starts, stop praying, and when your period ends, perform ghusl then start praying again.” Reported by al-Bukhari,

4. Death:

When his daughter Zaynab died, the Prophet said: Wash her with water three or five times, or as many times as you see fit” Reported by al-Bukhaari

How to Perform Ghusl:

A’ishah (May Allah be pleased with her) said that the Messenger of Allah sallah Allahu ‘Alayhi wassallam when performing ghusl from janaba used to wash his hands, then wash his private parts with his left hand. After that he performed wudu’ like that for prayer. Next he took some water and ran his fingers in the roots of his hair until he used three handfuls of water on his head. He would then go on pouring water on the rest of his body and wash his legs. It was reported by Muslim

Obligatory actions of Ghusl:
• Intention
• Washing entire body with water

Recommended Method of performing Ghusl:
• Wash both hands
• Wash private parts
• Make wudu’ as you would for prayer except the feet
• Pour water on head 3 times
• Pour water on rest of the body, making sure the water reaches all parts of your body
• Wash both feet

wudu’

Wudu

Allah said in the Qur’an in Surat AlMaa’idah

“O you who believe, When you intend to offer As-Salaah (the prayer), wash your faces and your hands (forearms) up to the elbows, rub (by passing wet hands over) your heads, and (wash) your feet up to the ankles. If you are in a state of Janaaba (i.e. after a sexual discharge), purify yourselves (bathe your whole body). But if you are ill or on a journey, or any of you comes after answering the call of nature, or you have been in contact with women (i.e. sexual intercourse), and you find no water, then perform Tayammum with clean earth and rub therewith your faces and hands. Allaah does not want to place you in difficulty, but He wants to purify you, and to complete His Favor to you that you may be thankful” [5:6]

The obligatory actions of Wudu’:
1. Washing the face completely once.

2. Washing the arms up to the elbows, once.

3. Wiping the entire head, including the ears.

4. Washing the feet up to ankles, once.

5. This must be done in order.

6. This must be done continuously, i.e., the parts of the body must be washed one after the other with no lengthy interruption between washing one part and the next.

Recommended actions of Wudu’:

Humraan the freed slave of ‘Uthmaan, said that ‘Uthmaan ibn ‘Affaan (may Allaah be pleased with him) called for water to do wudu’’. He washed his hands three times, then he rinsed his mouth and nose, then he washed his face three times, then he washed his right arm up to the elbow three times, then he washed his left arm likewise. Then he wiped his head, then he washed his right foot up to the ankle three times, then he washed his left foot likewise. Then he said, “I saw the Messenger of Allah sallah Allahu ‘Alayhi wassallam doing wudu’ as I have done it, then the Messenger of Allah sallah Allahu ‘Alayhi wassallam said, ‘Whoever does wudu’ as I have done it, then prays two rak’ahs in which he focuses completely on his prayer, his previous sins will be forgiven.’” (Narrated by Muslim, al-Tahaarah, 331)

A Summary of all (obligatory and recommended) acts of wudu’:
1. Must have the intention of making wudu’. The intention should not be spoken out loud for its place is in the heart. This applies to all acts of worship.

2. Should say Bismillaah.

3. Should wash your hands three times

4. Should rinse your mouth three times by swirling the water around inside your mouth (it is a highly recommended sunnah to use the siwaak while rinsing your mouth in wudu’)

5. Rinse your nose three times by pushing the water up with your right hand and blowing the water out
and using the left hand to remove the water from your nose.

6. Should wash you face three times, from the hairline to the jawbone and chin, and from ear to ear.
a… A man should wash the hair of his beard because it is part of the face.
b… If his beard is thin he has to wash it inside and out, and if it is thick and covers the skin, he should wash the surface of it only and run his wet fingers through it.

7. Should wash your arms up to the elbows three times. The arm extends from the fingertips, including the nails, to the lower part of the upper arm. It is essential to remove anything stuck to the hands before washing them, such as dough, mud, paint, etc, that could prevent the water from reaching the skin.

8. Should wipe your head and ears once with fresh water
a… The way in which the head is to be wiped is that you put your wet hands at the front of your head and bring them to the back of your head, then bring them back to the place where you started.
b… Then put your index fingers in your ears and wipe the back of the ears with your thumbs. With regard to a woman’s hair, she should wipe it whether it is loose or braided from the front of her head to the roots of the hair at the nape of her neck, but she does not have to wipe the entire length of her hair.

9. Should wash your feet three times up to the ankles, namely the bones at the bottom of the leg.

Nullifiers of Wudu’

Hadeeth of Safwaan ibn ‘Assaal (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: The Messenger of Allaah sallah Allahu ‘Alayhi wassallam used to command us, if we were traveling, not to take off our khufoof for three days and nights, except in the case of janaabah, but not in the case of stools, urine or sleep. Narrated by al-Tirmidhi, 89; classed as hasan by al-Albaani.

1. Urination

2. Defecation

3. Passing wind

4. Madhi: prostatic secretion that comes out when a person is sexually aroused

5. Wadi (fluid preceding or following urination)

6. Sleep:
• Deep Sleep nullifies wudu: (above Hadeeth)
• Light Sleep does not nullify wudu:

Anas ibn Maalik, according to which the Sahaabah (may Allaah be pleased with them) used to wait for ‘Isha’ at the time of the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) until their heads drooped, then they prayed and they did not do wudoo’.Narrated by Muslim, 376. According to the report of al-Bazzaar: they would lie on their sides.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: “The eye is the string that ties the anal sphincter; when the eyes sleep, the string is loosened.” Narrated by Ahmad, 4/97; classed as hasan by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’ , 4148.

7. Touching a Mehrem woman does not invalidate a man’s wudu:
• The most correct opinion is that it does not break his wudoo’, regardless of whether he touched her with desire or not, because the Prophet kissed some of his wives and did not do wudoo’ after that, and because it would impose a lot of hardship if wudoo’ was required in this case. If it broke a person’s wudoo’, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) would have said so.

Ai’isha (may Allah be pleased with her), the wife of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) who said, “I was sleeping in front of the messenger of Allah and my legs were in his qiblah. When he prostrated he touched me and I withdrew my legs, and when he stood I stretched them out”. (Homes in those days did not have lamps.) (Bukhari narrated it, #328.)

A’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her) says, “I noticed the Messenger of Allah was gone one evening from the bed, so I looked for him and my hand landed on the sole of his feet and he was in the masjid. They were close together and he was saying , “O Allah I seek refuge with you, pleasure from your anger, and with your pardon, and from your punishment. I seek refuge with you from what is falsely attributed to you as praise. You are how you have praised yourself”. (Muslim narrated it #486.)

8. Touching private parts:
• The prophet sallah Allahu ‘Alayhi wassallam said:

Whoever touches his sexual organ cannot pray until he performs ablution.

He sallah Allahu ‘Alayhi wassallam was asked about touching the private parts and he said: Isn’t it but a part of you?

The scholars tried to consolidate between both of the above ahadith and they said that if one touches his private parts with desire, then his wudu is nullified, but if one is touching it without desire (i.e. as they are dressing up, scratching..etc) then that would not nullify the wudu.

9. Wiping over the socks:
Question • When can one wipe over the socks?
Question • How is it done?
Question • For how long is the wudu’ valid after he wipes over the socks?
Question • How many prayers can he pray with a wudu in which he wiped over his socks?

Tayam-mum

Definition: It is a form of dry cleansing. It is done by using the earth as a substitute for wudu’ and Ghusl under the following conditions:

1- When water is unavailable or insufficient
2- When a person is incapable of using water because of illness or wounds, or because the water is freezing cold and cannot be warmed.

Procedures:
1- Strike both hands lightly on pure earth, rock, or sand

2- Blow the dust off the hands (optional)

3- Wipe the face once

4- Wipe the hands (to the wrists) as if you wash them
This is agreed upon

Evidence:
Ammar Ibn Yasser may Allah be pleased with him narrated that the prophet of Allah sallah Allahu ‘Alayhi wassallam show them how to make Tayam-mum when he placed his hand on the earth. Then he wiped his face and two hands

Question: For how long can a person use taya-mum instead of wudu’?

If you are interested in reading more about this topic please make sure you RSS to my blog simple click here —>

Next lesson will include:
o Classifications of Salah
o Conditions of Salah
o Hadith AlMus’ee

Nice Recitation

Surat Qaf